Phoenix

This is the second Sunday in a row where the day hasn’t gone to plan. Last Sunday I had the extreme pain in my calf and couldn’t bear weight on my left leg by the late afternoon.

Today I wanted a quiet day of reflection. There is not a lot of quiet time at the best of times on this estate.

I knew that the afternoon and evening would be quite noisy. Madness was performing at the cricket ground. Although I’m a good distance from the cricket ground it’s amazing how the sound travels. I like madness so wasn’t particularly worked up about the noise of the concert. Free music!

Early afternoon arrived and so did my difficult neighbour. It’s been 11 days since I last heard him around. It didn’t take long for him to come out on his balcony, shouting what a grass I am, and that both I and the local council have not won. He then continued with vile homophobic slurs. Not quite the afternoon I had intended! I saw him talking to another neighbour and she text to say he is indeed threatening to come for me.

The good news is he has moved all his stuff out and is going to live with his mum and look for a private rental. The bad news is he claims he is going to return and catapult my windows. This has produced anxiety for the safety of my cat. I’m not bothered about me. I have lost all patience and am too angry to care about his threats anymore. I did however end up on the phone to the police for forty minutes reporting the homophobic abuse he threw at me.

I am trying to diffuse my anger. It’s hard work. He has been a thorn in my side since I moved here three years ago. There is still the threat of his return, he still has the property for now and the council have not as yet enacted the eviction.

It took me a few hours to calm my nervous system back down. I sat on the floor in the middle of my lounge and played my singing bowl. Feeling the frequencies radiating across my home and dissipating his negativity from my space.

I eventually managed to eat and continue learning Für Elise on piano. I got further on in a section I had struggled with last night so that helped me feel better.

The concert at the cricket ground is all over now and it’s blissfully quiet. It may be 11.10pm and I do have someone coming over at 9am in the morning, but I can finally slip into the quiet contemplation I have been diverted from today.

Peace.

Phoenix