Phoenix

I had been slowly pottering around this quiet Sunday morning. Watering the plants. I put a couple of loads of washing on. Played with the cat. No out of the ordinary symptoms just the usual things.

My ASDA delivery arrived just after 1pm. The delivery guy drags three crates up the 28 steps to my front door. Occasionally I get a delivery driver that I haven’t met before. I always put on my delivery instructions the number of steps. It’s good to know they read the notes as new people will often say “You’re right, there is 28 steps!” I often wonder what their thought process is as they always say it, as if they are astonished? Is the astonishment that I can count to 28? Maybe they think I was just guessing at the number of steps and miraculously calculated correctly. As if I’d beamed into this flat and never traversed up or down the stairs! Anyway I digress.

As I was carrying items back and forth from the crates to the kitchen, I suddenly developed a stabbing pain in my big toe on my right foot. it felt like I’d stood on a shard of glass. I quickly took a look at underside of my toe…nothing visible. I went to put my foot to ground again and as I took a step forward another flash of excruciating pain shot through my big toe. I was in the kitchen when it happened. I put on my best I’m not in pain mask…nothing to see here, and completed the task of bringing the shopping in. Once finished I locked the front door and hobbled to the sofa.

I inspected my toe. There was nothing to see. No cuts or bruises or marks. I pressed deep into the base of my toe, nothing, no tenderness, no pain!

So I asked inside. “Is anyone bringing this pain”. I was a little suspicious as it happened when food was being brought into the home. Food is still an ongoing challenge. I sat for quite a while but no one knew why the big toe hurt?

I eventually went back to the kitchen and put all the shopping away…pain free!

It happened again once later in the day as I was walking back up the stairs after taking the rubbish down. Yes all 28 steps! As I stepped off the 28th step there was that flash of pain again and after walking back into the flat it was gone again.

This has been happening intermittently for months in different areas of my body. My left foot, my right knee, my shoulder, my hand. The pain is hot and intense and I’ve yet to figure out what is going on.

Maybe it’s a glitch in the matrix? Maybe a version of me in an alternative universe has hurt themselves and I’m feeling it? Or maybe there’s an alter who I’m either not connected to or who doesn’t want to speak up.

I do find it anxiety provoking. I have a high pain threshold and so when a random pain strikes so intensely it knocks me sideways.

I’ll keep trying to unravel the mysteries!

At least it’s been fairly quiet and I have had several wonderful sessions swinging on the balcony in my egg chair.

Let’s see what mysterious moments unfold tomorrow?

Phoenix